Pockets of Feelings and Italy’s Phase 2

54 days in lockdown. 8 weeks.

When my daughter was around five years old, unnamed feelings overwhelmed her. As she tried to adapt to the different cultures she was exposed to, the languages and accepted social behavior, she was experiencing more and more the need to belong. We watched her in awe, amazed by her ability to navigate the labyrinth of belonging with incredible easiness. Other times it was as if watching a barrel full of gun powder ready to blow because of her helplessness to name the feelings she was experiencing. To give voice as well as hoping to help her develop a healthy emotional language, we created the Pockets of Feelings. A rectangular piece of fabric, two pockets from old jeans sewed onto it, a happy face on one pocket, and a sad face on the other. It was like a mailbox for all the feelings she couldn’t name or was too enraged to be able to spit them out verbally. It worked. The pockets were filled fast daily. Her mood and coping skills improved.

In the beginning, she placed drawings inside the pockets and communicated if she wanted to talk about them or not. If she wished to remain silent, the main rule was that her desire needed to be respected no matter what. We couldn’t push her to talk, as well as we couldn’t refuse to listen. Later on, when she learned to read and write, she left written reminders if she wanted to talk…